Rejection. It is one of the most profoundly disappointing human emotions, and the question always exists: Is it easier to reject or to be rejected?
Both. Rejection hurts, but you can ease your mind with positive thoughts and encouragement from friends and family. When you reject someone, you have to face the inevitable truth that you’re going to cause hurt to another person. That isn’t easy to do. However, there are ways to make it a little easier.
1.) Be quick and painless, like a bandaid. You want to avoid statements like “well maybe…” “I could possibly…” “Someday…” These are misleading statements that suggest a hypothetical future still awaits the two of you, when in reality it doesn’t. You don’t want to give the other person any room to hope; contrary to what you’re thinking, it doesn’t make it easier.
2.) When you do reject someone, use a calm, apologetic voice. “I’m sorry, I just don’t feel the same way” or “I would rather we remain just friends” are both good statements in these situations.
3.) Be prepared for an emotional reaction. You never know how someone will react to rejection. If they’re angry or upset, remain as calm and sympathetic as possible. Do not get angry. Don’t resent their feelings if they get insulting; it’s just because that person is hurt. Wait until they’re through and then apologize again and politely excuse yourself.
4.) Make sure there’s no one around when you have this talk. There’s nothing more embarrassing than having multiple witnesses to someone rejecting you. Respect that person and deal with them respectfully – even if you don’t like them. No one deserves to be unnecessarily embarrassed or hurt.
5.) Take a break from them. Whether you sit next to them every day in class or you’re close friends, give them some space to breathe. People need to come to terms with upsetting events, and it’s best done outside of your presence. So, instead of giving into the temptation of chatting them up during class, just say a simple and polite hello. Don’t ignore them, but give them time to move on without distracting them.