Raise your hand if you are in a interracial relationship. Now raise your hand if you are struggling in a interracial relationship. Well don’t worry. Though the subject of making an interracial relationship succeed can be vast there are some narrow avenues of thought that can bring the task back into manageable proportions.
When you think about it there is only two factions of people that can try and get in your way of having a successful relationship. These factions are called internal and external groups. The internal people are those persons in the relationship and external people are everybody else.
Look at it this way. There are all sorts of doubts, thoughts, ignorance, cultural divides and struggles two people can go through in an interracial relationship but if that is your mindset in the beginning you have beaten yourself before you even started.
Both of you must be on the same page from the start gate. You should be communicating your fears to each other and negating those fears with knowledge. You both should have a natural curiosity to know as much as you can about your partner and don’t laugh at a silly question. Stereotypes and perceptions are the name of the game but you want to turn those factors into true perspective.
Once you both have it in your minds and hearts that you want your interracial relationship to work the only ones that will try and hinder your happiness is the external factions. These are people that will have something to say about the type of relationship that you wish to have.
Your external adversaries may be your brother, close friend, sister, father, mother or just random ignorant people on the street. Someone is not going to understand why you want to date outside your race. It is important to know it is not their job to understand.
The only two people that need to have understanding of a relationship are the two people in that relationship. You need positive people in your life surrounding your relationship and if someone can’t respect the relationship you have then there is no need to be around those people. It is a hard decision to make but you have enough problems to deal with without other people making it hard for your both.
Remember a lot of people will try and breakup the happiness that you both created but there is only two people that are responsible for a relationship to succeed or fail.
Today ends the series about interracial relationships for now. This will be an ongoing discussion as long as the column is active. As long as you have questions there will be answers to find so don’t think we will end right here.